Beth's half birthday

Yesterday we celebrated Beth's half birthday. This is a tradition we started a few years ago when we found that most of our birthdays fell in the first half of the year and so it helped brighten up the Autumn and early Winter. A year is a very long time for small children, especially when your birthday falls so close to Christmas as Tiarnan's does. It's also another occasion on which to make a child feel special which when you're one of a large clan is very important.
As we've had such a mild winter there was also a rose to pick for the table!

Our Baby is 4!

I can't believe Tiarnan is now 4. Having had 6 babies over a period of 10 years and enjoying Tiarnan's babyhood as long as possible ( he was breastfed for the best part of 3 years compared to only a year for the others as there was always another catching up behind! ), it's hard to remember a time when we weren't organising our lives around the needs of a baby. And whilst all six children will always be my 'babies' we don't have an actual baby anymore which is unfamiliar territory. I think that as I had each new baby, I appreciated that little bit more, each extra chance to mother a newborn, taking less for granted as I got older. As the other children were older when Tiarnan was born they also got to enjoy him as well as Justin and I, so his time as a baby was extra special.
We are now entering a new phase of our lives, as parents of older children, and having been blessed with the opportunity to mother so many beautiful babies I now feel ready to embrace that change.

Tiarnan served his cake his way, giving everyone a piece of the top layer before the  bottom!

The Morning After

This year we decided to invite all our neighbours in for an evening of mulled wine and mince pies. We live in a rural area with a cluster of houses adjacent to farmland, so it was nine families in total. As our road is fast with nasty bends we all end up driving everywhere and so it is very easy to go about your day to day life without actually seeing anyone, let alone have a conversation. Add to this the fact that we are no longer at the school gate twice a day and you can feel a bit reclusive. We feel that community is important and so Christmas was a good excuse to invite everyone in.
We initially had some resistance from the children, especially as one family included a child they had known from another class in school and who they felt was unfriendly. We had a run of 'do we have to?', 'they don't invite us so why should we invite them?'. We felt it was important though and that we all need to be pushed outside our comfort zone sometimes and to make an effort instead of just using being busy as an excuse. We therefore went ahead, softening the blow by pointing out that it would be a fantastic opportunity to socialise Holly and that they could consider it a puppy party instead! We gave out Christmas cards early, including invitations and all but one couple accepted.
On the evening we lit lots of candles, had music playing and lots of mulled wine and nibbles, and with the Christmas tree all lit up it was a lovely festive atmosphere. After the introductions, which were a bit iffy as we were trying to remember names having not lived here that long ourselves, everyone seemed to be getting along really well. The children initially found it a bit awkward but then a big gang of them went outside with torches and wands that Santa had brought to play Harry Potter. Apparently they offended one little boy by suggesting that he should be Professor Umbridge but otherwise a good time was had by all.
At breakfast the next day we then asked the children how they had found the party and whether we should do it again next year. They agreed that although they had had reservations, on balance it been a good thing to do. They heard one lady say that she had lived here 14 years and it was the first time she had spoken to another lady just a few doors up and so could see the benefit of having helped bring people together. Hopefully they have also learnt how it is good to be the ones to take the initiative rather than just sitting back and waiting for life to happen!

New Year's Resolutions

Justin got a call-in to work the night of New Year's Eve so we sat down to do our resolutions yesterday evening. The guys like to make an occasion of it so we write by candlelight with glasses of fizzy drink and a bowl of sweets. We keep all our resolutions in a box so the first thing we did was take turns to read out last years lists and see how many of last years resolutions we had each been able to achieve. Of the things on our lists there were some things we had managed, the children more than Justin and I, but a lot we hadn't. Maybe we had been a bit over optimistic last year but there were still more than a couple of things we should have managed which got lost in the busyness of our day to day lives. This year therefore we decided that we would try two things; One, we would take out our box of resolutions at a few different points during the year to remind ourselves of what we are trying to achieve. Secondly, by sharing our resolutions with each other we will try to support one another and by 'roping-up' will also be more likely to stick to our efforts.
New Year is a good opportunity to have a fresh start and begin the year with a clean slate. We also think it important that the children reflect on the year past and then set their own goals for the year ahead. We try as much as possible to help teach them to be self directed instead of us imposing our will on them so that they will be self reliant and able to be directed by their own internal compass. For Justin and I too, it helps us be more mindful and prioritise the important things.